A Starter Guide To Self Imporvement "Build Your Self Esteem"

So how do you stay calm, composed and maintain self esteem in a tough environment? Here are some tips you may to consider as a starter guide to self improvement.

Imagine yourself as a Dart Board. Everything and everyone else around you may become Dart Pins, at one point or another. These dart pins will destroy your self esteem and pull you down in ways you won't even remember. Don't let them destroy you, or get the best of you. So which dart pins should you avoid?

Dart Pin #1 : Negative Work Environment
Beware of "dog eat dog" theory where everyone else is fighting just to get ahead. This is where non-appreciative people usually thrive. No one will appreciate your contributions even if you miss lunch and dinner, and stay up late. Most of the time you get to work too much without getting help from people concerned. Stay out of this, it will ruin your self esteem. Competition is at stake anywhere. Be healthy enough to compete, but in a healthy competition that is.

Dart Pin #2: Other People's Behavior
Bulldozers, brown nosers, gossipmongers, whiners, backstabbers, snipers, people walking wounded, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders, patronizers, sluffers,all these kinds of people will pose bad vibes for your self esteem, as well as to your self improvement scheme.

Dart Pin #3: Changing Environment
You can't be a green bug on a brown field. Changes challenge our paradigms. It tests our flexibility, adaptability and alters the way we think. Changes will make life difficult for awhile, it may cause stress but it will help us find ways to improve our selves. Change will be there forever, we must be susceptible to it.

Dart Pin #4: Past Experience
It's okay to cry and say "ouch!" when we experience pain. But don't let pain transform itself into fear. It might grab you by the tail and swing you around. Treat each failure and mistake as a lesson.

Dart Pin #5: Negative World View
Look at what you're looking at. Don't wrap yourself up with all the negativities of the world. In building self esteem, we must learn how to make the best out of worst situations.

Dart Pin #6: Determination Theory
The way you are and your behavioral traits is said to be a mixed end product of your inherited traits (genetics), your upbringing (psychic), and your environmental surroundings such as your spouse, the company, the economy or your circle of friends. You have your own identity. If your father is a failure, it doesn't mean you have to be a failure too. Learn from other people's experience, so you'll never have to encounter the same mistakes.

Sometimes, you may want to wonder if some people are born leaders or positive thinkers. NO. Being positive, and staying positive is a choice. Building self esteem and drawing lines for self improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent. God wouldn't come down from heaven and tell you "George, you may now have the permission to build self esteem and improve your self."

In life, its hard to stay tough specially when things and people around you keep pulling you down. When we get to the battle field, we should choose the right luggage to bring and armors to use, and pick those that are bullet proof. Life's options give us arrays of more options. Along the battle, we will get hit and bruised. And wearing a bullet proof armor ideally means 'self change'. The kind of change which comes from within. Voluntarily. Armor or Self Change changes 3 things: our attitude, our behavior and our way of thinking.

Building self esteem will eventually lead to self improvement if we start to become responsible for who we are, what we have and what we do. Its like a flame that should gradually spread like a brush fire from inside and out. When we develop self esteem, we take control of our mission, values and discipline. Self esteem brings about self improvement, true assessment, and determination. So how do you start putting up the building blocks of self esteem? Be positive. Be contented and happy. Be appreciative. Never miss an opportunity to compliment. A positive way of living will help you build self esteem, your starter guide to self improvement.

Article Source: http://www.ArticleStreet.com/

Blushing Problems? ETS Surgery Could Be The Worst Mistake You Make

ETS or Endoscopic Thoracic Sympathectomy is an operation that is performed on people who suffer from severe flushing of the face, Rosacea or certain forms of anxiety. But if this is something that you are considering then be warned as the picture is not quite as idealistic as you might hope nor think.

Although some "experts" recommend such drastic measures to reduce or eliminate people's suffering there has recently been much documentation on the negative after side effects after having ETS surgery performed.

Such side effects include compensatory sweating - where you actually begin to experience excessive sweating in other parts of the body that you previously didn't seem to have a problem with. This is common and when you think about it - it's simply a way of the body trying to do its job via other methods considering the natural method has been 'tampered' with.

Other side effects are Horner’s Syndrome where drooping eyelids, sunken eyes, imbalance in the sweating distribution across the face (from one side to the other) blood shot problems and even pigmentation problems that can be seen to have an effect on one or both of the eyes.

People have also reported Neurotis and Neuralgia which are both problems associated with painful or inflames peripheral nerve endings - mainly in the face and spinal chord. It doesn't end there though; other well known side effects are -

Decreased heart rate (which has a detrimental effect on our physical well being - particularly when exercising)

Dry and flaky facial skin

Pneumothorax - accumulation of air gas in the pelvis which can lead to disease

Hemothorax - accumulation of blood in the chest

But if that wasn't enough, let me list all the known and possible future side effects:

Sensitive Pleurae (chest lining sensitivity) limiting exercise
Horners Syndrome occurrence rate 0.3% (drooping of the eyelid)
Heat intolerance
Pneumothorax (collapsed lung)
Bleeding
Postop Neuralgia and parasthesias are uncommon
Possible hair loss
Bradycardia (slow heart rate) possibly requiring a pacemaker
Subcutaneous emphysema
Possible conversion to open thoracotomy
Possible recurrence of symptoms
Possible necessity for re-do operations
Treatment failure can occur if Kuntz nerves are present and are not cut.
Gustatory sweating (increased sweating while smelling or eating) occurs in some patients.

So, it's clear to see that the side effects of such drastic surgery could potentially lead to far worse conditions than of the problems you are currently experiencing.

Of course there are certain cases where people are experiences such severe discomfort or even out right pain that such a surgical procedure is deemed necessary and therefore ETS is a plausible option.

However, if you are experiencing blushing or redness as a result of psychological or lifestyle causes then you should seriously think twice before going under the knife.

Blushing is a real problem for many people, I know that as wee as anyone having experienced the problem of blushing for many years. However,I can say how glad I am that I never went to such drastic measures in order to deal with what then seemed like the biggest problem in my life...blushing.

These days, after having worked towards my own self improvement, I no longer see blushing as a problem and hardly notice it when I do blush.

It does take a shift in your outlook, but I know it is possible to overcome blushing if you really want to. See my website below for more details on how I actually that.

Author : Nick Britton

http://www.isnare.com/?aid=215573&ca=Self+Help

Self-Transformation: Five Steps to Being the Person You Want to Be

There was a time I can remember when some people used to wear bracelets with the inscription “WWJD”? This question, "What would Jesus do?", was designed for its wearer to be reminded to act in a way he or she valued and wanted to emulate. This provided a path for Christians but what about those who didn’t believe?

Now, anyone can ask themselves a similar question: “What would I be doing in this situation if I were being the person I want to be”? You no longer have to compare yourself to the son of God. Simply craft a vision of the person you want to be.

It is very similar to the process companies go through when deciding their vision, values and mission. We do it in companies, why not in our personal lives as well? What is your vision of the person you want to be? If you were being your best self, how would you behave?

What are the guiding principles and values by which you choose to live your life? If you are an adult, you no longer have to live by the values of another. You get to choose the ideals you want to emulate in your private life. What will they be? Kindness? Success? Wealth? Fairness? Friendship? Power? Loyalty? Competition? Cooperation? Respect? Honesty? You get the idea. Decide the values you will use to guide your life. Values become the measurements of how you make your decisions. They aren’t just nice to use when all things are going well. Your values are the tools you use to help you decide what to do in every situation. How can you know what to do if you haven’t identified your highest values?

Here is the process of self-transformation:

1. Develop your own true north. Know your values, the path you are on and the steps necessary to stay true to your beliefs and direction. Write out your vision statement for your life and determine your life’s purpose.

2. Identify supporters and detractors. Surround yourself with your supporters and limit or eliminate time with detractors.

3. In every situation, ask yourself the question, “If I were being the person I want to be in this situation, what would I be doing”? Access your values and higher ideals to answer this question.

4. Assess the likely consequences, both positive and negative, and prepare for those consequences.

5. Line yourself up and act in the way you would if you were being the person you wanted to be.

There will likely be saboteurs along the way. You will have strangers, friends and enemies alike who don’t want you to succeed. When you lead your life by values instead of situations, others may not appreciate your new direction. You have changed and are no longer the person they want you to be. In systems theory, when you change one part of the system, the entire system must adjust to compensate for the change. Those around you may not want to change, thus they are invested in keeping you just the way you are. Watch out for this kind of external sabotage.

The second kind of sabotage comes from within. Self-sabotage can be your worst enemy and it requires your constant, alert, conscious attention to overcome it. The scientific truth is that as we develop certain behaviors under certain circumstances, our brain creates neural pathways which cause us to behave in the same manner under similar circumstances unless we constantly pay conscious attention to what we are doing and we make different choices. We need to override our default brain chemistry in order to do something differently. If you are serious, you must be vigilant. Getting an accountability partner, a coach or a mentor can help you overcome self-sabotage.

Enjoy your transformation to becoming the person you want to be.

Author : Kim Olver

http://www.isnare.com/?aid=346507&ca=Self+Help

Goal Attainment: What Would You Have to Give Up?

As 2008 draws to a close, some of you are already looking ahead to what you want to do in 2009. It’s the time of year we begin to self-reflect and adjust our course for the upcoming year.

In my work coaching people, I find it interesting that many of my clients set very clear intentions for what they want to accomplish. They are passionate about it. They put in the required work for a period of time. And then something happens. Self-sabotage.

Does this sound familiar? Have you ever vowed to lose 10 pounds, speak nicer to your children, stop smoking, save money, pay off credit card debt, or maybe make a weekly date with your life partner? You mean it. You want to do it. You actually do it. And then you slack off?

Do you know why? There is actually evidence in neuroscience that explains why we drift back into old behaviors. Our brain actually wires itself to perform repetitive tasks without conscious effort. If you do something in the same sequence enough times, the neurons that are required to perform this task will automatically fire together in the familiar sequence whenever you are confronted with a similar situation and you aren’t vigilantly aware of what your mind subconsciously is programmed to do.

If you are accustomed to eating potato chips whenever you feel stress, then when you aren’t paying attention, at the first sign of stress, you may find yourself halfway through a bag of Ruffles before you even realize you’re eating.

Our brain is invested in maintaining the status quo. You weigh a certain amount. You aspire to a certain degree of happiness. You make a particular amount of money. Scientists have come to understand that our brains have particular set points, much like the thermostat in your home regulates the heat. Therefore, your brain, your subconscious, can work against you in accomplishing the conscious goals you set.

How is it some people are successful in pushing past their set points? There are several ways to do it. One is to maintain a constant vigil of consciousness to your every move. This is extremely exhausting but it can be done with great determination. Other ways include hypnosis or various energy psychology techniques, such as EMDR or EFT.

Another way is to bring whatever is subconsciously sabotaging you out into the light where you can consciously deal with it. In my work with coaching clients, I have found this to be a very effective question at getting to the root of the unconscious sabotage. Ask your client, “What would you have to give up to get what you want”? I’m not talking about the obvious, e.g. in order to lose weight, a person would have to give up chocolate and free time to exercise. I’m talking about really digging deep.

I asked a woman once what she would have to give up to lose the weight she wants and she looks at me dumbfounded and said, “My husband.” Upon further exploration, she subconsciously believed that if she got healthy enough emotionally to lose the weight she carried, then she would move beyond where her husband was and they would no longer be compatible.

Another woman I was working with was having difficulty breaking through her income barrier. She had her own business and just couldn’t move past the $50,000 mark. When I asked her what she would have to give up to be the successful business woman she truly wanted to be, she said she would lose her father’s love and approval. Her subconscious belief was that her father would love and approve of her as long as she wasn’t any more successful than he had been.

A final example was a man I was working with to develop his own coaching business. He had the skills, abilities and resources but just wasn’t making progress. When I asked him the question, what would he have to give up to leave his job and go out on his own, his answer was his dream. He was worried that if his dream wasn’t successful, then he would have nothing left. Better to have the dream intact than fail at the one thing he truly wanted.

So, this year, ask yourself this tough question. When you get the deepest answer you can find, examine it closely in the light of day. Is it valid? Is it important? Is it worth sacrificing your goal for? Only you can answer these questions but you’ll never even get to these questions unless you do some digging and get to that subconscious sabotage that often lurks in the background waiting to derail your forward progress. Don’t let it happen again this year. Take control and make conscious, intentional decisions.

Author : Kim Olver

http://www.isnare.com/?aid=346492&ca=Self+Help

3-Easy Steps To Instantly Find And Identify The Power Of God In Your Life

If you have ever wondered ‘where is the power of God in my life?’ If heavy and downturned times have you looking for more of God now than before, then these 3-steps may be the most important message you read today. Because once you are armed with the knowledge of what to look for and where to look for it… you will never again ask the question ‘where is the power of God in my life?’

3-Steps To Instantly Find And Identify The Power Of God In Your Life

1) Look to see how you are treating others

How you treat others has a lot to do with how much of the power of God you witness in your own life. No matter how evil or twisted you may be, God’s power is still flowing into your life, however; you will almost never see it. Why? Because how much of God’s hand we actually get to see and be aware of is directly related to how we treat others. The age old golden rule still applies, “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.” If you are having a hard time loving yourself, don’t worry. If it’s hard to love yourself then it’s also hard to love anyone else. And that is OK! But you can at least respect others the same way you would want to be respected.

One of my great teachers taught that sometimes it is too difficult to even try to love a certain person, but it is NEVER too difficult to respect this person. No matter how much a person gets under your skin, it is only you who control how this person affects you. If you are looking to witness God’s hand in your life begin to seek moments, places and people where you can treat others with more respect and a level of human dignity you would wish for yourself.

2) Write down a list of all you are grateful for

If you want to see where have your miracles gone and where your blessings have been deposited, then make a list of everything you have to be grateful for in your life at this moment. If you have nothing to be grateful for then you are looking at life with the wrong lenses. Look around to see what you have that is of value to you, something that means more to your life than to your bank account. Then make a list of the top 5-most-precious things for this category in your life. And carry this list and a pen with you everywhere you go. The moment you recognize something you are grateful for add it to the list. And everyday, 2 times per day read the list…no matter how crummy or great you are feeling…read the list everyday. After 33 days you will notice that not only is the power of God shinning brighter for you but there are real results happening for you that are making your life more like the dream you want and less like a nightmare.

3) I am the Love of My Creator, I am My Creator’s Love, I am Love

How are you treating yourself? Do you over discipline yourself or treat yourself like a spoiled child? Neither extreme calibrates the balance of order in your life. It is hard to see where God is in moments of chaos such as when a violent crime takes place or a massive natural disaster strikes. But it is far more difficult to see where God is in our life through chaos created by actions of our own doing. Seek the things you most like about yourself and count them on your list of blessings. We all come from a divine place and even if you don’t believe it, we were all created from a place of love. Whenever you are in your darkest hour, soaking in a personal triumph or any other time at all, repeat to yourself an ancient mantra passed down through generations of spiritual masters:
I am the Love of My Creator, I am My Creator’s Love, I am Love.

You will feel the power of God burst from everywhere around you. The more you use it the more you will own it. The more time you spend saying this mantra and thinking about it, the more love you will draw to you and the more of God’s power you will see manifest in your life.

Author : Carlos Duran

http://www.isnare.com/?aid=346997&ca=Self+Help